sadness

I had a great time during our retreat in Tagaytay. Naka reflect talaga ako and I came to realized a lot of things about myself and my relationship with God. Super sarap pa ng food doon and ang lamig pa.We had our retreat sa St. Charles Borromeo Retreat House. Ang cool lang kasi patron saint ko si St. Charles- feastday niya kasi birthday ko. Sad part lang is that konti lang kami. We were just 20 retreatants plus 6-7 Jesuit brothers. Ok in a sense na mas intimate and mas may space, pero i always say na sana nandito rin yung ibang mga atscans, especially the b6. Lagi ko silang naiisip during the retreat and i was hoping na they too would experienced what I was experiencing there. But anyhow, the retreat was very nice! I don't know if maka retreat pa ako in the future...

Now I'm back in Katipunan, and it feels weird and sad at the same time na almost everyone is in their provinces already. Parang ang lungkot lang na ako na lang mag-isa dito sa katipunan and a few people na lang. It's just different if alam ko na si Nescy nasa Burgundy lang or si Doryll nasa apt niya lang or si Ger nasa Prince lang or si Christa nasa Xanland lang or sina Ros, Jus and everyone else ay nasa condos/ dorms lang nila. But now, they're not here. I am experiencing the feeling na no one is around me na if may problem ako, walang malapitan... ang drama... But truly, ang sad lang ng feeling na ganito. Kung nandito sila, hindi naman kami nagkikita everyday pero the feeling na nandyan lang sila makes me feel safe and happy. In short, I miss these people.

Na coconnect ko siya in the future. Feeling ko ganito ang mararamdaman ko after college. Syempre I'll be working here and all of us seniors will live in different places. Some will live in Makati, others in Ortigas, others in Taft, others in the provinces and others in abroad. Naiisip ko na I'll also feel sad kasi alam ko na malayo na kami sa isa't isa. I can't invite them na sa movie or inuman kasi busy na rin sila sa life nila and i'll probably be busy also. I can't invite din naman the undergrads kasi busy rin sila sa school. Syempre, i'll meet new friends along the way, pero I just hope na magkitakita pa rin kami ng old friends ko.

No, hindi pa ako nag senior's syndrome (slight lang)... napapaisip lang ako... Ok fine, senior's syndrome na siguro. Last sem na!!! Many people are excited to graduate and work, I am too pero a part of me is sad because of the new changes that will happen, the new adjustments that I will face and the new life in general ahead. I will miss my college friends, kasi I know na if ever mag meet kami years from now, it will never be the same again. Medyo mature na and work na yung pag-uusapan and probably hindi na ganoon ka jolly or I don't know..

It's depressing to think about it, but as of now I'll relish my present time with my friends, do well academically next sem and just have fun next sem. I'll be in bacolod this sunday and I'll enjoy my last official school sem break.